Today I learned that it's impossible to stealthily purchase a statue of naked people at the Salvation Army. Especially when the statue is 3 feet tall. It's not like condoms or tampons. You can't just sneak it onto the counter and expect that the cashier will look the other way.
Saturday I went to the Salvation Army looking for a costume for a play, and I saw this statue of two naked people intertwined in an embrace. It's an ugly gray plaster statue, and I would have bought it right then and there if it had only been $5. But it was $30, which is a ridiculous price for anything at the Salvation Army. Then I told one of my friends about it, and she is an artist, and she is getting married, and she thought it sounded fantastic.
So I went back today hoping that maybe, just maybe, this awesome/terrible statue would still be there. I was actually worried that someone else would have snatched it out from under me. But as luck would have it, the statue was still there. I circled it for awhile, kind of embarrassed that I was actually considering getting it. Then I took a deep breath and picked it up and carried it to the counter. Immediately, the cashier says, "Finally, someone's buying that thing! I was going to wait until it went on sale and then maybe get it myself!" So of course I say, "Wait, when is it going on sale?" Alas, not for another two weeks, and I just couldn't take the chance.
I bought it. And I didn't bargain for it, because I don't think they let you do that at the Salvation Army. I might just putting a bow on it and put it out on the gift table at my friend's wedding. (Don't think I'm cheap - they have actually requested no gifts, so I'm really going overboard here.) Babbling away nervously, I explained all this to the cashier. By this time another cashier had come up to the counter and was also commenting on the statue. They were giving me tips on how I could present it. Drape a scarf around it, put a veil on it! It would look great in a garden or on a patio. Oh, but then you'd have to weatherproof it somehow. Etc, etc. Cashier #1 also shared that if she ever does get married, she's going to wear black. Because she thinks wearing white means something, and she doesn't want to disrespect that. And now I know a little bit more about her.
So Steve, this is my blog for you! Because I promised you I would blog, and I did! I hope you are suitabley impressed.
Edited to add: Oops! I almost forgot to link to your blog, Steve. Everyone go read Steve's awesome blog.
Wednesday, March 04, 2009
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Happy Freakin' New Year
Okay, all 3 of my fans, as you all know, 2009 has not been very good to me so far. Thank god there are still another 347 days left in the year in which good things can happen. Anyway, I'm getting back on the wagon and blogging again. It's about time, I know.
This is just going to be a quickie entry to say hello and commit to having something more substantial posted within the week. I intend to use this blog to get some more practice writing, and gain some perspective about life. It will definitely be cathartic, that's for sure. And hopefully it will amuse you as well.
Signing off for now, I promise some excellent entries about the most recent ridiculous-ness that has been my life so far this year. Oooh, I'm so melodramatic, aren't you intrigued already?
Edited to add: As you can probably tell, I've had a depressing couple of weeks. But some good has come of it, which I will go into in more detail in future posts. But I would like to share a couple of thoughts that I have come across that have helped me out a bit.
First, don't let someone else's actions hold you hostage. (Unless it is a physical hostage situation. Which hopefully you will never experience. In which case, don't try to be the hero, just lay low until the cops rescue you.)
Second, enjoy the fun of failure.
Pretty deep, huh? Those are some philosophical thoughts to get you thinking until my next post. These came from the Happiness Project. I have to admit that my inherently cynical nature makes me raise an eyebrow at some of the stuff on this website, but at the same time, there's a lot of good food for thought.
This is just going to be a quickie entry to say hello and commit to having something more substantial posted within the week. I intend to use this blog to get some more practice writing, and gain some perspective about life. It will definitely be cathartic, that's for sure. And hopefully it will amuse you as well.
Signing off for now, I promise some excellent entries about the most recent ridiculous-ness that has been my life so far this year. Oooh, I'm so melodramatic, aren't you intrigued already?
Edited to add: As you can probably tell, I've had a depressing couple of weeks. But some good has come of it, which I will go into in more detail in future posts. But I would like to share a couple of thoughts that I have come across that have helped me out a bit.
First, don't let someone else's actions hold you hostage. (Unless it is a physical hostage situation. Which hopefully you will never experience. In which case, don't try to be the hero, just lay low until the cops rescue you.)
Second, enjoy the fun of failure.
Pretty deep, huh? Those are some philosophical thoughts to get you thinking until my next post. These came from the Happiness Project. I have to admit that my inherently cynical nature makes me raise an eyebrow at some of the stuff on this website, but at the same time, there's a lot of good food for thought.
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